Decades ago, I experienced a life-shifting moment of spiritual awakening. An inner light turned on. I was filled with compassion. This was a new feeling for someone who lived in anger and annoyance most of the time.
This feeling expanded toward everyone. Even bullies.
I realized that bullies are just afraid. They choose to cover up fear by pretending to look powerful. They believe that generating fear in others will keep them safe so no one will find out they are terrified.
I understood that, like everyone else, bullies desperately want love, but part of them believes they do not deserve it.
Once I understood, my own anger diffused. I forgave those who bullied me as well as those using bullying tactics.
These last weeks have been challenging to keep an open heart. Watching the senseless bullying going on, I think about the leaders waging thousands of years of war and framing it as justified. They use their bully pulpit to convince people to take sides and jump headlong into a killing machine.
As a lifelong pacifist, it boggles my mind as to why so many agree to participate. I don’t understand why one would inflict the greatest of human rights violations on strangers.
My questions feel urgent as bombs explode and deaths occur.
The expression from the ‘60’s recites in my brain: What if they gave a war and nobody came?
The only answer is that we all have a denied, suppressed inner bully. It is the part of us that reacts with fury when feeling insulted. Or rages at others while driving. Or threatens a child when they don’t obey. Or violently berates ourselves when we do something stupid. That is the big one.
If we did not have this primitive, survival-based trait inside us, no one would be compelled to join a war machine.
Watching the war unfold, that subconscious bully is palpable. It inspires me to stay focused on the truth. Each dropping bomb triggers suppressed memories.
I choose to clean up what I have allowed my own inner bully to do and forgive my self.
I vow to awaken my higher consciousness love.
This will create inner peace.
The peace that is the core of consciousness itself.
I am a weapon of mass compassion.