R U OK DAY is often a day in the calendar that I find myself really looking forward to. This is mainly to do with the importance of the day itself but as these days have come and gone and I’ve found myself speaking at different places all over the country, it has started to become a significant day of reflection.
The very first time I ever got up in front of a group of people and shared my story was for R U OK DAY which to many, may sound like a simple starting point for any speaking career but to me it was a little more complicated than that. Let me explain why:
I’ve always been terrified of public speaking (Not the best start).
I had no idea what to talk about - Even though I was asked to talk about my story, it didn’t even have an ending yet, this was only 4 months after the attack.
I was afraid of judgment - I thought everyone would be staring at my leg the whole time.
I was scared I’d say “Um” a million times - Product of #1
I felt like an imposter - What did I have to teach? What could they take away?
There were a lot of things shouting at me to say no to the prospect of following through with this and there’s definitely an alternative world where I decided that it just wasn’t my thing and life rolled on. But as I reflected on what R U OK DAY meant and the significance that it had on my life only months before, I decided that I had a duty to overcome these fears and to give back.
I’m glad that I did. Because without this experience, who knows what I would be doing now?
Maybe I would have been presented with another opportunity that had the meaning required for me to push through these barriers but the idea of highlighting something positive and aligning with this message and the notion of support that I believed in was the perfect way to start.
So every year as R U OK DAY approaches in the calendar, I reflect on why I’m doing all of this and I’m always met with a sense of gratitude that this day has essentially changed the course of my life. Are those complications I mentioned above completely gone? Absolutely not. I don’t think they will ever disappear but they are much easier to overcome when you know you’re doing it for the right reason.
This year I was lucky to stay close to home and present to the lovely people who work for my local council. Whilst this isn’t a complete full-circle moment, it was great to have an opportunity to give back to the people of an area that supported me so much during my time of need. There was something comforting about seeing the familiar faces in the crowd and peering through the windows of the Kiama Pavilion to see the place I call home draped under the beauty of a magnificent Spring day.
I often say reflection is a powerful tool that I use to both measure how far I’ve come and to help plan what I want in the future. After reflecting on yesterday, It still feels strange to say, but I’m proud that I can call speaking my job and I can confidently say that I can’t wait for more experiences like that in the years to come.